It has been awhile since I have updated on the blog, so this may be a long(er) post. Over the course of the last 20+ days life here has had slow changes. Now that the benefit is over, things are a bit more relaxed and the the piles of things for the it diminished. There were however some prizes that were not selected on the prize wall, so sometime in the coming weeks the prize wall will make a reappearance. With so many businesses so generous, we want to make sure we gift them to give Jen the most reward. But for now, we are enjoying a little down time from world of benefits.
Jen had a local hematology appointment yesterday to check her counts. Her counts have been on the up swing for a couple of weeks and yesterday her numbers were the best they have been since she got sick last fall. I don’t think Jen believes it yet, as she still feels very ill most days. Fatigue, weakness, and pain are daily complaints and some days I feel frustrated in how to help.
Jen saw an orthopedic doctor last week to see if there is a source to her continued back pain. Early results say she is suffering from substantial muscle loss due to no activity for so long. The only thing she can do is to work through this pain through physical therapy. They ordered aquatic therapy but it will be another week before she can get that started. Along with pain comes nausea and fatigue. There is no magic pill or cure for all this. Time and prayer and pushing through it is all that can be done. This makes me often feel helpless as endless tears are shed daily.
If there ever has been a time I have felt ill-equipped for the job I am to perform, it is now. The smiles Jen was able to share at the beginning, aren’t as frequent. And despite her positive numbers, the cancer has left behind a young lady who suffers daily both emotionally and physically. I have told her many times she will get there….but at this time, she isn’t buying it. The PTSD from leukemia is far too real.
In addition to the stresses of leukemia, the stresses of our pet family has also been difficult. A couple weeks ago, Jen had to put down her cat of sixteen years. He was in renal failure and could no longer keep food down. In addition to losing Kodak, my dear dog Molly has had no improvement. Later today, she has a vet appointment in which I expect will be coming home without her. She no longer can lift her back end and she spends her days laying on her side on a cushion. I bring food and water to her and after I sit her up, she takes a long drink and a few bites and goes back to laying down. My heart is broken but I don’t want her to suffer any longer.
Rally Together With Jennifer and Be The Match was a beautiful day. There were 15 people who signed up to be on the donor list, which means 15 more options for registry to look at when someone is needing bone marrow. Hopefully, when we are able to do another event with Be The Match we can sign up twice as many! We also were blessed with nearly 200 guest to help celebrate Jen’s remission. Jen spent much of the day outdoors and enjoyed visiting with people she hasn’t seen much of lately. Thank you to all who came. Also we raffled off the $3000 Disney Cash. My dear high school friend Beth Kortokrax won! Beth’s older brother Rob died from leukemia a few years back so it felt so perfect that she won. Her two youngest children had saved money up to buy the tickets. Congrats to Beth and her family!
We had so many generous businesses help us and I will be making a list of all those in a future blog. It all would not have been possible without their help. I hope for life to get less complicated, less trips to Columbus, and Jen to get strong enough so she and I can return back to our normal lives soon. And when we do, I have a ton of paying it forward to do.